Give Me Your Love... to Give Back to You
Have I ever mentioned that I'm a hot mess?
Yeah, like only every day.
Every day I try to love,
Every day I try to be patient and kind,
Every day I fail.
Yup, I just keep poopin' in my diapers.
And as I keep learning more about God and myself,
I come to realize that NOTHING of myself is good.
For example...
I'll be in prayer and say "Jesus, I love You",
But then I realize the "love" that I have is so INSUFFICIENT.
MY version of love says "I love You Jesus, I trust in You!" one minute,
Then I'm doubting and complaining the next.
My version of love says "I love You" one minute,
Then I'm irritated because I'm being inconvenienced.
My version of love says "I love You" one minute,
Then I'm short-tempered because I'm not getting WHAT I want WHEN I want it.
Yeah... my love is NOT good,
I don't even want my love for myself!
THEN there's the love of Jesus,
Yeeeesss... that's the GOOD stuff.
The stuff that lasts.
It like the difference between a dirty used sticky note that keeps on falling,
Versus the SUPER sticky note that will hang onto anything you put it on.
I want Jesus' super sticky love that won't let go no matter what.
That's why my prayer has changed a bit,
The more I realize how insufficient and LAME my love is,
The less comfortable I feel saying "Jesus, I love you."
Cuz then in my mind I'm like,
"That's really lame love... You deserve better."
So then I started to pray like this,
"Jesus, I love You..."
"But give me Your love so I can give it back to You." ^_^
That is the ONLY way I can give Jesus the quality of love that He deserves.
Jesus truly is our EVERYTHING.
He is our FAITH,
He is our WISDOM,
He is our LOVE,
We really can't do ANYTHING without Him.
"for apart from Me you can do nothing"
Ain't that the TRUTH!
This is not at all a low self-esteem thing,
It's not a negative mindset thing,
It's just the TRUTH.
We CAN'T do ANY of the things we're called to do without getting supplied by Jesus FIRST.
"I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit"
If you want to bear much fruit,
Not your stank human fruit,
But divine, life saving fruit that transforms lives,
We need to PLUG into Jesus and get all the traits from Him,
Including LOVE.
"Dear Heavenly Father,
Help me realize that I can't even LOVE You properly,
That my LOVE is so stank,
That my abilities are so shallow,
That I MUST ask You for EVERYTHING.
I need You to give me YOUR LOVE,
To be able to LOVE You the way You deserve,
And to LOVE others the way You called me to.
May people know You by the way I LOVE with YOUR LOVE.
I'm a hot mess,
I need You,
I want You,
I praise You.
In Jesus name, Amen."
Cheers to getting LOVE from Jesus so we can give it back to Him and others.
How silly yet perfect!
Yes, we are silly humans that need Jesus for EVERYTHING. ^_^
Have a silly and blessed day!
